creamwolfgurl
Decent Member
A moonlit plain~a flash in the shadows~Lunar is winging across the Moon
Posts: 494
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Post by creamwolfgurl on May 21, 2007 1:48:25 GMT -5
Darkness alone cannot oblige
To open the stilled forever eye
That breath and life has yet forsaken
Left to crushing earth and flame.
Why bring back spark to those in darkness?
Brighten the pale face of starkness
Left to moulder in the ground
Or burnt by ethereal flame.
Something whispers at the moonlight
Creeping, waiting in the midnight
Fierce hate for those who live
Breath is such a passing thing.
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Post by mysteria on May 21, 2007 21:52:42 GMT -5
Moonlight in the Dark?
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creamwolfgurl
Decent Member
A moonlit plain~a flash in the shadows~Lunar is winging across the Moon
Posts: 494
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Post by creamwolfgurl on May 22, 2007 1:26:31 GMT -5
Well, it's kinda about Death. (don't ask why, I was bored in Maths and was writing without thinking.)
But Death can be such an offputting title.
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Post by snowkitty on May 22, 2007 11:29:19 GMT -5
Wow...very deep. Obviously about death, but nice. I like the line, "Breath is such a passing thing." Very final and bittersweet.
I can't suggest a single name, but something simple and meaningful would work. "Breath", perhaps?
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creamwolfgurl
Decent Member
A moonlit plain~a flash in the shadows~Lunar is winging across the Moon
Posts: 494
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Post by creamwolfgurl on May 23, 2007 0:08:05 GMT -5
*thinking*
it might SOUND deep, but I wasn't thinking when I wrote it.
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Post by Maggie on Jun 15, 2007 10:14:46 GMT -5
Well, it is deep. I like it!
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creamwolfgurl
Decent Member
A moonlit plain~a flash in the shadows~Lunar is winging across the Moon
Posts: 494
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Post by creamwolfgurl on Jun 16, 2007 0:35:41 GMT -5
Ocean Depths
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Post by wionasfate on Jun 23, 2007 10:14:05 GMT -5
Well, that's useful. How come whenever you aren't trying, things come out the best? I have a friend who is really good a drawing. All her best pictures are on the back of textbooks or on the back of her math test. She draws during class alot. As for the title of the poem, I sometimes put the last line of the poem as the title, or a varyation of the title. Like, 'passing breath' or something.
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creamwolfgurl
Decent Member
A moonlit plain~a flash in the shadows~Lunar is winging across the Moon
Posts: 494
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Post by creamwolfgurl on Jun 25, 2007 3:07:27 GMT -5
Hmm....these are very good ideas. I like "Passing Breath' personally.
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